Trust In the Lord: Proverbs 3:1-8

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Pro. 3:5-6, NASB).

Erik Erikson, well-known and highly respected psychoanalyst, says that all of us develop in stages where we learn certain developmental skills to cope with life’s crisis. Erikson says that the first stage of development occurs in the first year of life. In this stage of development the child develops a sense of trust versus a sense of mistrust. He says that how we develop in one stage affects the next stage in significant ways. In other words, how a child develops in stage one will affect how the child develops in stage two. It is hard for a person to develop the skills needed in step eight if they have not successfully developed the skills needed in step one. Erikson says that a person can grow up with a firm sense of trust, but the right experience can cause confidence to crumble. If Erikson is right, we can never fully trust each other, and particularly we cannot trust ourselves. However, our scripture passage tells us that there is one who we can trust all day and every day in any experience in life.

Now, the text before us is one of my favorite scriptures. Certainly, it has helped me to make it through some hard times and some difficult days. I have learned that even though I cannot always trust others and myself, I can trust God. The problem for many of us is that we have not learned to trust God. We pray, attend church worship services, and identify with the saints. We allow what others do control what we do because we have not learned to trust God. It’s like we are saying to God, “I know you. I like being around you. I like the things that you do for me. I like the way you make me feel. Yet, for some reason, I still don’t really trust you. I don’t have any particular reason, but I just cannot really trust you. You see, I really don’t trust myself. I have never learned to trust anyone.” Why is trust a problem for so many people?

Erikson says that trust is not automatic. Trust is possible, but trust is not a given. Trust is not something that we give to others or receive from others. Trust is something that is developed. In infancy the child develops a basic trust for their primary caregiver; usually the mother. The mother senses that her child needs something. The mother provides the child with their needs. For example, when the child is hungry, the mother gives the child food. When the child is cold, mother covers the child to keep it warm. The child in return gives mother their heart. The child allows the mother to introduce them to new experiences because the child has learned that mother will give them what they need. As the mother provides her child with physical needs, the child experiences pleasure or pain. An emotional bond develops which helps to shape the child’s mental development. As the child grows older, he/she allows the mother to introduce them to new experiences because they have learned that mother meets their needs. The child does not need to know what mother is doing. The child eagerly follows the mother’s cues because the child trust mother. Unfortunately, we can learn to mistrust other people and ourselves.

Based upon Erikson’s theory, if trust is not developed, mistrust is developed. This means that the person that has developed mistrust has little confidence in others. The person that mistrust may learn social skills that hide their mistrust from others. Sigmund Freud believed that people often intentionally do things so that it appears that they like something that they dislike, but they don’t want others to know. So, a person gets married because that is the socially acceptable thing to do. The reality is that the spouse does not want to be married; does not love their spouse; and don’t trust their spouse. The woman marries a man that looks like her daddy, acts like her daddy. It appears to others that the woman really loves and trusts her husband. Nothing could be further from the truth. She secretly despises her daddy and her husband. She does not trust either of them. So, if trust is a basic skill that is developed, how does our lack of trust in other people and ourselves affect our trust in God?

The teacher in Proverbs advises the student to trust in the Lord. Before the teacher gives this advice he says that we must first fear God. We must have as healthy respect for God if we want to have knowledge of God. “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction” (Prov. 1:7, NASB). So how do we learn respect for God? We learn God and respect for God much like a child develops their trust and admiration for their mother. First, we come to know God; who God is; what God is like; His care of us. In Hebrew life this knowledge is not an inherited trait. Rather, the parents are to live as examples for their children. The parents are to show their trust in God by obeying His commandments and receiving His blessings. The child learns to trust God, and through obedient experiences they learn that God can be trusted (See Deuteronomy 6). How can we know if we truly trust God? Let us look at two examples.

The story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15 gives us our first example. Now, we usually talk about the wayward son who meets misfortunes in his life. The son goes home and the loving father greets him and gives a party to celebrate his son’s return. What we don’t talk about often enough is that the son trusts his father. In the story, the son receives his inheritance money from his father. For whatever reason, the son leaves home. He spends all of his money, and he ends up in a pig pen. In his desperation the son thinks about his father. After deliberation within himself, he decides to go home and ask his father to hire him as a servant. Now, think about this. What gives the son the idea to return home? Why does he think that his father wants to see him, much less hire him? It is because the son trusts his father. He trusts his father because his father had always met his needs. He knows his father’s character. He has developed a trusting relationship with his father. The son does not see himself as a son deserving of his father’s goodness. He does trust his father to be the man that he has always known him to be. This is a man that he can trust.

When the angel Gabriel tells the Virgin Mary that she will give birth to a son even though she does not yet have sexual relations with the man that she is engaged to get married to, Mary does not understand how the angel’s words can be true. The angel explains, and Mary trust God’s messenger. She says to the angel, “Behold, the bondslave of the Lord; may it be done to me according to your word” (Luke 1:38).

When we trust God, we do not depend (lean) on our own understanding. Rather we admit that God knows best, even when we know nothing. There are so many situations that we find ourselves in that we do not understand. We do not know what to do. We are not wise enough to make the right decisions. God’s wisdom is not like the wisdom of the world. The world has limited knowledge while God has knowledge of everything. The wisdom of the world is flawed. The wisdom of God is pure and beyond human understanding. If we trust God, we allow Him to make our paths straight.

There are a lot of people that are experiencing life without trust. Trust is something that we learn through relationships. There is so much mistrust in our country today because we do not developed trust relationships in which people meet the needs of their family members, friends, church members, and others. Further, we do not have trust in God. This is true because we have no knowledge of God. In the Luke 15:1-2, these words are recorded. “Now all the tax collectors and sinners were coming near Him to listen to Him. But the Pharisees and the scribes began to grumble, saying ‘This man receives sinners and eats with them’” (NASB).

The Pharisees do not trust Jesus. They depend on themselves. They do not know who Jesus is, and they do not know His purpose. Jesus tells three parables to show them that they are walking down a crooked path that leads them away from God. The tax collectors see that Jesus knows their needs. By speaking kind words of hope and seeing the sick healed they develop trust in Jesus. Jesus breaks the rules of His culture. He sits down and eats and drinks with them. Because of their status in their communities they are rejected by the religious leaders. Jesus welcomes them all to hear the good news that God loves them, and He is here to demonstrate God’s love for everybody. They are learning to trust Jesus because He knows their needs. He loves them unconditionally. A relationship marked by trust is being developed. Like infants, they do not fully understand His purpose. They only know that they can put their trust in the Lord.